It’s frustrating for care providers when their client comes armed with a 10-page birth plan, an army of doulas, and a mistrustful and hostile attitude. Care providers exist for the sole purpose of providing medical or midwifery services for pregnant, birthing, and postpartum clients and their goal is to help them emerge healthy and whole. Unfortunately, this creates friction before the relationship begins. 

A mistrustful client has probably already had her trust broken by someone else long before they come armed with the minute details of how they need things to unfold. They may have already experienced abuse, neglect, sexual assault, victimisation, and trauma. Their trauma might have been the result of an abusive childhood, racial adversity, marginalisation, being the victim of a crime, or it might have been the result of a previous traumatic birth experience.