Everyone has an intellectual/mental/emotional operating system – a personal paradigm that serves as a frame of reference containing basic assumptions and ways of thinking. This personal paradigm is the means by which we make sense of the world around us. It helps us to filter, understand, and categorise information and experiences. It helps us to know what is “true” and what isn’t; it guides our responses and our actions.

Humans are designed to be in connection with each other. We operate mostly unconsciously through hormones, synapses, and other magical pathways. Our primary operating system is our para-sympathetic nervous system – our “calm and connected” system. This part of our autonomic nervous system keeps our hearts beating, our lungs breathing, and our food digesting. The main hormone of this system is oxytocin – the hormone of love, trust, bonding, and connection. This is why isolation is so effective at crushing and changing people, and why friends and loved ones can heal and nurture new ideas.

Personal paradigms, once settled and serving us reasonably well are most likely to be changed by 2 things: Great Suffering or Great Love.